You Know It's A Bad Day When...

your twin sister forgets your birthday.

you wake up face down on the pavement.

you put your bra on backwards and it fits better.

you call suicide prevention and they put you on hold.

you see a "60 Minutes news team" waiting in your outer office.

your birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles.

your only son tells you he wishes Anita Bryant would mind her own business.

you want to put on the clothes you wore home from the party, and there aren't any.

you turn on the TV news and they're displaying emergency routes out of your city.

the woman you've been seeing on the side begins to look like your wife.

you wake up to discover that your water bed broke and then realize that you don't have a water bed.

it's such a beautiful day that you decide to walk to work only to find out that you tucked the back of your dress into your pantyhose.

you go to sign-on online and they tell you "Your account is currently in use"....

the local news shows don't have enough traffic helicopters to cover all of the accidents.

you notice that the gift from your boyfriend has another woman's name on it.

you're looking through the want ads and you find that your boss has placed an ad for your current job.

You wake up.